I Got the CEO Job. Then I Hid It for a Month.
When I got promoted to CEO of the small charity I ran, it took me over a month to share the news with my team, my network, even people close to me. I told myself I hadn't been "CEO-y" enough in meetings, or that a small charity didn't really count as a CEO role at all. It was classic imposter syndrome, dressed up as reasonable doubt.
That month of silence cost more than an awkward delay. I avoided the CEOs and directors who could have helped me grow into the role, and ultimately, helped the charity I was there to serve.
I knew even then that this was about confidence. What took much longer, and needed a coach's help, was working out what "confident" actually meant to me in that role, and what, specifically, was getting in the way of it. Not "I want to feel more confident," but: what would that actually look like here? And what, precisely, is missing right now?
That distinction matters. Confidence as a headline is too vague to act on. Confidence broken into its parts - the beliefs, the gaps, the moments it goes missing - gives you something to actually work with.
Lasting Confidence Comes from the Right Conditions and Continued Action
Getting curious about those questions is what let me act: naming the self-limiting beliefs, being specific about the fears, and being honest about the real skill gaps that come with any promotion.
But confidence isn't a one-off fix, it's a practice. Two things kept mine going. A peer group of other directors and CEOs, where we could be honest about what was hard and celebrate even the smallest wins. And protecting the parts of my routine, including a morning walk and time to read, that kept me steady enough to keep showing up.
It's a pattern the research backs up too: confidence grows less from pep talks and more from small, repeated proof that you can do the hard thing.
Try it yourself
Four questions to get curious about your own confidence:
Where do you most want to feel more confident in how you live, or how you lead?
What's behind the parts where you don't feel confident?
If you worked on that, what would "more confident" actually look like?
What's one small step you could take that would move it forward?
Build confidence with others
If those questions leave you wanting more, my Living and Leading with Confidence group programme might be for you.
Over six live sessions with a small group of 6–8 and me, a trained group coach, you'll unpack what confidence really means for you, build the habits that create it, and have a group in your corner while you practise.
The next cohort starts Wednesday 23 September 2026.
